How Online Family Counselling Sessions Work

Blog | Family

In this guide, I will explain how I work with couples who are married or in a relationship online. I also offer online family counselling for larger families, as well as for parents and adult children, one parent and an adult son or daughter, and so on.

Online family counselling sessions are usually done on Google Meet. I recommend that couples use separate devices and stay in different rooms if they can. This way, they can feel more comfortable and free to express themselves. This is not a requirement, but a suggestion.

The first session is meant to identify and clarify what the couple wants to achieve and how we can work together to reach that goal. For those who are planning to join me for online family counselling, it is important to understand the following:

My main goal and task is to help the partners, their bond, and their interaction with each other.
I do not take sides or favor one partner over the other. I give everyone equal time and attention, and I make sure that everyone has a chance to speak and be heard. I ask questions to help them clarify their thoughts and feelings, and I prevent any rude or insulting remarks from either partner. I also encourage them to use each other’s names instead of pronouns when they talk about each other.
I do not tell them what to do or how to solve their problems. I help them understand their situation, its causes and consequences, and what they want to accomplish. I also help them figure out how to get there.
I treat both partners with kindness, respect, and empathy. I do not judge them, blame them, or criticize them.

In the first session, I ask both partners to describe their perspective on the current situation in the following order:

Tell me how you met, what attracted and impressed you about them, and what you liked about them. What is good about your relationship with them, and why is it valuable to you?
Tell me what you are currently unhappy with in the relationship, in your partner’s behavior, or in your own behavior. Focus on their actions, not their personality, and give me some specific examples that make you feel negative emotions. Tell me when this started and how long it has been going on.
Tell me what you want from the relationship in the future, why you value your partner and your relationship with them, and whether you believe that you can improve your relationship. Tell me if you are willing to work on the relationship, as well as on yourself.

Author: Mark Lisevych

25 December 2023

What are the benefits of a free consultation?

Getting to know the psychologist: You can talk to the psychologist to see if they are a good fit for you in terms of their work style, personality, and specialization.

Defining the problem: You can describe your problem in detail and get qualified advice from the psychologist, which will help you better understand the nature of your problem.

Developing a plan of action: You can get recommendations on how to solve your problem, which methods and approaches may be the most effective.

Feeling supported: You can get emotional support and feel that you are not alone, because the psychologist will listen to you attentively.

Who is a free consultation suitable for?

Those looking for a psychologist: A free consultation can help you make the right choice, as you can talk to several psychologists before making a final decision.

Those who are unsure whether they need psychotherapy: A free consultation can help you understand whether psychotherapy can help you solve your problem and whether it is right for you.

Those who have a limited budget: A free consultation is an opportunity to get qualified help from a psychologist for free, to see if you need further psychotherapy.

Those who may be nervous or hesitant to start psychotherapy: A free consultation gives you the opportunity to overcome your fear of the first meeting with a psychologist, get answers to your questions, and feel more confident.

Important:

A free consultation is not a substitute for psychotherapy.

In a free consultation, the psychologist cannot give you a final diagnosis or prescribe treatment.

The purpose of a free consultation is to help you determine if a psychologist and psychotherapy are right for you, and to give you the first steps to solving your problem.

Potential benefits of a free initial consultation

During this first session: potential clients have the chance to learn more about you and your approach before agreeing to work together.

Offering a free consultation will help you build trust with the client. It shows them that you want to give them a chance to make sure you are the right person to help them before they move forward. Additionally, you should also be confident that you can support your clients and that the client has problems that you can help them cope with. Also, you can avoid any ethical difficult situations about charging a client for a session in which you choose not to proceed based on fit.

We've found that people are more likely to proceed with therapy after a free consultation, as it lowers the barrier to starting the process. Many people starting therapy are apprehensive about the unknown, even if they've had sessions before. Our culture associates a "risk-free" mindset with free offers, helping people feel more comfortable during the initial conversation with a specialist.

It's important to note that the initial consultation differs from a typical therapy session:

It can last from 15 to 30 minutes, with the specialist determining the appropriate length for this introductory meeting.

The free initial consultation is not intended to be a full therapy session. It is an opportunity for the client to learn more about the specialist and their approach to therapy, and to decide whether they want to work together.

The specialist should set clear boundaries for the free initial consultation, including the length of the session and the topics that can be discussed.

The specialist should be prepared to answer questions from the client about their experience, training, and qualifications.

The specialist should not give specific advice or recommendations during the free initial consultation. This should be done during a paid session.