Family Therapy for Couples in Crisis: How It Works and When to Try It
When two people decide to share their lives, they often face challenges and conflicts that arise from their different values, beliefs, and expectations. Marriage is not a simple solution that resolves all the difficulties in your relationship. It requires constant effort and communication to maintain a healthy and harmonious relationship.
Some of the questions that couples may struggle with are: How can we balance our individual and shared needs? How can we show empathy and compassion to each other? How can we nurture our love and intimacy?
Finding answers to these questions on your own can be very hard, especially if you feel hurt, angry, or misunderstood by your partner. That is why seeking professional help from a family psychologist can be very beneficial for your relationship.
A family psychologist can help you identify and understand the root causes of your conflicts and grievances. They can also help you decode the hidden messages that you and your partner send to each other, sometimes without even realizing it. These messages may reflect your unmet needs, fears, or insecurities that affect your relationship.
In the first sessions of family therapy, the psychologist will help you and your partner express and listen to each other’s feelings and needs in a safe and respectful way. You will also learn to recognize and challenge the unrealistic or distorted images that you may have of yourselves and each other.
As you continue with family therapy, you will gradually rediscover each other and appreciate your strengths and differences. You will also develop skills and strategies to cope with conflicts and stress in a constructive way. You will learn to empathize and respect each other, which will improve your relationship quality and satisfaction.
However, family therapy is not a miracle cure that works for everyone. It depends on many factors, such as the competence and experience of the therapist, the goals and expectations that you have from therapy, and most importantly, your own willingness and commitment to work on your relationship.
Family therapy can only be effective if:
- You and your partner both agree to seek help from a psychologist and have a genuine desire to improve your relationship;
- You and your partner both take responsibility for your own actions and emotions and how they affect your relationship;
- You and your partner both are ready to make changes and work on yourselves, and if needed, seek individual therapy to address your personal issues.
If any of these conditions are not met, then family therapy will not be helpful and may even be harmful for your relationship. Therefore, before you decide to start family therapy, make sure that you and your partner are on the same page and have realistic expectations from the process.