How to Provide Support for Someone Experiencing Grief ?
Grief can take many different
forms but most share the common factor of being unbearable at the onset. It can
have severe effects on one’s emotional well-being and even hinder daily life.
It is important to support loved ones who might be going through grief. There
are mainly five stages of Grief, that is, Denial, Anger, Bargaining,
Depression, and Acceptance. This can be elucidated in the following commonly
heard dialogues form someone dealing with grief:
Denial: "It’s hard to believe this is real; everything
feels surreal right now."
Anger: "Why did this happen? It's so unfair!"
Bargaining: "If only I had done something differently,
maybe things would be better."
Depression: "The sadness feels overwhelming, like there’s
no way out of this pain."
Acceptance: "I’m starting to find peace, even though things
will never be the same."
Grief often manifests in
different forms such as emotional, physical, and even behavioural changes in
oneself. Grief is unique to each person as there is no standard set for how one
must go through grief. One must be wary of certain misconceptions such as, “time
heals all wounds”, which is not necessarily the case for all. Usually, we grow
around grief and over the years, its impact on us shrinks but appropriate help
and support from close ones is required.
How to Offer
Emotional Support?
- Being Present: Sometimes, the grieving person wants our presence and not talking it out or find solutions. Just being there is reassuring for them that they are not alone in this.
- Listening without judgment: When they are ready to talk, listen without any judgment or preconceived notions and do not jump to find solutions.
-
Validate their feelings:
It is crucial to understand that we must acknowledge what they are feeling and
not rush them to get over it already.
Practical Ways to
Help
- - Offer to assist them in daily chores such as getting groceries or washing the dishes for them. These routine tasks might also be extra taxing for them in their current state.
- - Do remember to give them space when needed but also keep a regular check on how they are getting by.
- - Plan small outings like a walk in the park nearby or a quiet cup of coffee at a café can provide them with some relief.
- - If possible,
suggest some activities or hobbies that they may like.
Caring for
Yourself as a Supporter
While you offer your care and
support for them, make sure not to neglect your self as well in the process.
Take some time off for yourself and seek out professional help if feeling too
overwhelmed.
It is helpful to remind
oneself that supporting someone through their grieving period is not an easy
task. It requires ample amount of patience, compassion and one being available for
them. Do encourage an open and honest conversation about their struggles in
order to reduce any feelings of isolation they might be having.
