Anger is Not What You Think!!
Anger is a faithful companion in our daily life frustrations. It’s not only an emotion but an alarm system that blares when our boundaries are crossed or when we experience unfair treatment. It’s a natural phenomenon, just like laughter at a joke or tears while watching a heartbreaking movie. But often anger gets a negative reputation when mishandled, unlike other emotions.
Considering the tackling of anger with finesse, there are some misconceptions that need to be discussed. This article is all about unveiling the truth behind anger and discussing a few common myths about anger that transform this righteous force into a villain in the public eye. Here are some of them.
Myth #1: You can’t alter the way you express anger.
A common myth is that anger expression is inherited and unchangeable. However, our facial expression and nervous response are inherited, but the response (behavior) is learned, and unhealthy behaviors can be unlearned and replaced with healthy behaviors. Persistent practice to stay calm is required.
Mth #2: Anger inevitably results in aggression.
Angression is not the only way to express anger; rather, assertiveness is the ultimate key. One can constructively control the spiraling of anger through learning assertiveness skills, challenging irrational thinking, and developing “positive self-talk.”
Myth #3: Being aggressive is a must to achieve your goals.
People often mislead aggression with assertiveness. Aggression includes dominating, blaming, and harming others emotionally and physically, while assertiveness aims to win the situation while keeping the environment hostile and blame-free.
Myth #4: Expressing anger is consistently beneficial.
For many years, it has been a popular opinion that channeling anger through screaming, hitting a pillow, or throwing/breaking things safely is desirable. Recent research demonstrates that expressing anger through aggressive behaviors will only strengthen anger instead of diminishing it.
Myth #5: Releasing anger alleviates one's anxiety.
Those who are victims of violence often trade anxiety with anger as a coping mechanism. It does reduce the anxiety, but in a destructive way. Anxiety or fear can only be overcome by facing it.
Myth #6: Only saints or weaklings suppress their anger.
This myth arises due to a black-and-white thinking error. People often believe that only those who are either weak, hopeless, or have a glorified soul can suppress their anger, but in reality, in order to deal with situations, one must be firm and in control, or, in other words, be assertive.
References
Maunder, D. L., Cameron, L., & Charlton, F. (2023). Controlling Anger . Tyne and Wear NHS Foundation Trust.
Reilly, P. M., Shopshire, M. S., Durazzo, T. C., & Campbell, T. A. (2019). Anger Management for Substance Use Disorder and Mental Health Clients: Participant Workbook. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration.
