I’m a Psychologist and here’s something that one can do when going through a really tough time, is try to be a bit more self-compassionate.

It’s hard but there is one way of doing it, and that’s to be a curious observer of what’s going on with you rather than being caught up with it. So notice what is changed in your body, your brain and your behavior. So in your body, is your heart rate different? Is it faster, or slower? Are you holding any tension anywhere in your body? Are your palm sweatier? Is your body reacting in different ways? In your brain, are your thoughts different? Are you catastrophizing (jumping to the worst possible conclusion of a situation) and ruminating more? Is your harsh self-critique really loud? And in your behavior, are you avoiding the things that used to give you pleasure? Are you withdrawing from people, places or situations that you used to be okay with?

If you become more of a curious observer of yourself, you create a gap where you are reflecting rather than reacting. You are giving yourself some psychological flexibility and a chance. And more importantly, you are developing some self-compassion. Look on yourself kindly. And in that gap and with that compassion, you can start to heal.